I Must-ache You a Question

Compared to last year, Halloween was an absolute breeze this year.  Our elementary school has made a lot of changes with regard to security this year which includes only allowing parents who volunteer for the classroom parties to actually attend the festivities.  And as neither of my boys brought home the information sheet until about a week after it came out I was too late to volunteer for either one.  They did still have the costume parade, and Matt and I were both able to go up and see the boys march around in their costumes for a few minutes.

After dinner one of Matt’s friends came over with his little boy (who’s about a month younger than Kaylee) and we took the four kids out trick or treating.  We have an awesome neighborhood for trick or treating because there are lots of kids in the neighborhood and most of the houses offer candy.  We ourselves generally don’t buy a whole lot of candy for two reasons.  First, Matt and I both love to go trick or treating with the kids, so as a general rule we both go out.  This cuts into the time that trick or treaters are able to come to our door cutting down on the amount of candy that we need.

On top of that the way our neighborhood is set up there are multiple streets perpendicular to ours with 2 or 3 parallel to ours intersecting them.  Our street is on the very edge of the neighborhood and there are only 5 houses on my side of the street.  My neighbor to the left works long hours and is almost never home.  My neighbor to the right is either elsewhere for Halloween or has both parents trick or treating like us.  The house on the very end has had approximately 6 different occupants in the 10 years we’ve lived here and for whatever reason not a whole lot of people trick or treat there.  That leaves exactly one house on my side of the street that kids can go get candy from.  For most that seems like too much effort and so not very many kids trick or treat our street even if we were here to give out candy.

All in all it was a very uneventful Halloween.  The three little ones lasted about an hour before being done with trick or treating, then Matt and Brendan stayed out for about another 30 minutes before coming home as well.  It was nice to finally get the kids all out of their costumes and tucked into bed that night at a decent hour.  Especially since the following day was going to be another eventful one.

I’ve learned in recent years that November is an awareness month for prostate and other cancers suffered by men.  Our local hockey team supports Movember and grow out beards and mustaches in support of the cause.  In past years that was the only thing I was aware of them doing.  This year however, they’ve taken it a step further.  The team is selling fake mustaches at every home game in November with the proceeds going to support the charity.

I had forgotten that the game on that Friday night would be the first one with the fake mustaches for sale, because for some reason I had forgotten that the day after Halloween is always November 1st.  Go figure.  I had all of the kids with me at the game since Matt was working that night. The mustaches were only $.50 apiece but  I hadn’t thought to bring any cash with me because I wasn’t planning on buying anything that night.

The boys were too busy playing with their cousin (who also happened to be attending the game that night) to notice anything as mundane as fake mustaches lying on a table, but Kaylee saw them.  One of our friends works at the booth and saw Kaylee eyeing them, without even finding out if I had any money or was planning to buy them, fished two quarters out of her purse and handed them to Kaylee.  She toddled right over to the mustaches and paid one of the other ladies her quarters and got herself a mustache.


I went ahead and helped her stick it onto her lip, but didn’t hold out too much hope that it would stay there for long.  Kaylee is notoriously fidgety with stickers.  They stay on her shirt for approximately 3.9 seconds before being peeled off and stuck to (among other places) her arm, her hand, her pants, her shoe, her forehead, the cart, her carseat, her hair, her brother, her mother, the floor, the wall, etc, etc, etc.  She’s just never quite happy with where she stuck it and it constantly moving it from one place to the next.

We sat down to watch the first period of the hockey game and Kaylee went to snuggle onto my brother’s lap.  With her content there and the boys content with video games, I was able to enjoy the game without too much interruption.  I sort of forgot about the mustache thing until the period ended and Kaylee came back over to me.  It was then that I noticed that her mustache was amazingly still stuck to her lip right where it had been.  She hadn’t moved it once.  I can’t say she didn’t touch it because even as I looked at her then she was fingering it very lovingly.

Evidently the mustache was quite soft and she enjoyed the feeling of it.  So we went through the rest of the game, Kaylee switching to various laps during the game but always sitting quietly and enjoying the softness of her mustache.  We finally got home from the game around 10:30 that night.  The boys quickly changed into their pajamas and climbed into bed.  Kaylee took a little longer since she was over tired and fighting me about going to bed.

After a few failed attempts, I got her changed into pajamas and a diaper and started to reach up and take off her mustache.  She covered it up defensively with her hand and said, “Noooooo, my mustache!!”  I tried to explain that it was bedtime and she couldn’t sleep with her mustache on.  She started to cry and wailed, “Noooooo!!!  I sweep wif it!!!”  I was tired, frustrated, and really not in the mood to deal with a tantrum.  Deciding that it couldn’t possibly hurt her to sleep with it on her lip I consented.  She happily climbed into her bed and as I left the room I could see her gently stroking her soft mustache in the semi darkness.

The next morning I discovered just what the harm in sleeping in her mustache was.  She woke up mustache free and at first I figured that the adhesive had worn off during the night and we’d find it later somewhere amongst her mess of bedclothes.  That was not the case.  The adhesive was just as sticky as it had been the night before except now, instead of being stuck to her lip, it was entwined in her hair!  10 minutes and 50,000 ouches later my daughter was finally mustache free.

I’m all for supporting the Movember cause, but I really think that might just be my daughter’s last foray into the mustache world.


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